This little lovie is my constant companion.
She loves to play doll house, draw, cut, and glue, bead necklaces and bracelets, read books, watch her shows, play pretend just about anything, and to make her little sister laugh. When she plays doll house the mommy, Dalene, sounds very mean and a little too strict. Sigh. I'm trying to find balance. When she does crafts she makes a huge mess but she loves it and I love it occupying her time. Her beaded jewelry? I let her play with it or we "mail" it to family and friends, but then I cut the string and put the beads back in her baggie. She never chooses to read books, so I will often grab a stack and start reading to myself, and before the end of the first page of the first book she is snuggled by my side. She loves to watch Miss Spider's Sunny Patch and Team Umi Zoomi and Little Bear and Franklin. I can't stand Franklin and we're trying to watch less TV. We pretend our lives away playing doctor/patient or mommy/sweetie or Tangled/Mother Gothel. I never get to be Tangled. She is so good at getting Kaia to laugh and helping me with Kaia. I don't know what I'd do without her.
She comes into our room twice a night saying that she is scared of the dark. Half asleep, I walk her back to bed and tuck her in. She's asleep in seconds and once in awhile I stay and watch her sleep. I often get emotional, still, at how fast the time has gone with her. She is such a child now and has very few baby-like tendencies left. I hope we are doing an okay job with her because the end of the really formative years seems to be approaching.
My favorite recent memory with her was sledding in Vermont with Melissa and Maya. Zoey cried more than she laughed, I think, but wanted to keep sledding. She's so funny like that.
When we tell her we're going to take a picture she totally poses and it is funny but also a little irritating. Sometimes I want a nice, normal picture, not her tilting her body one way or another. Oh, well.
She LOVES preschool and church: her friends, teachers, and lessons. She has grown and changed so much just since September and I find myself overwhelmed with gratitude for the teachers in her life.
I struggle with balance where Zoey is concerned. I want to document her life while it is fresh in my memory, but is it worth ignoring her for 30 minutes to do a blog post or a scrapbook page? I want her to be kind and accepting but not too trusting. She is polite and well-behaved, but are my expectations too high? I want her independence to grow but I dread the day she no longer needs me.
To say I love this little lovie seems like an understatement.
This little lovie is my other constant companion. Constant as in most of the day and even some of the night.
She loves to climb up and down the stairs, empty out any and all bins, cupboards, and drawers, eat Cheerios and puffs off the floor, dance, jibber-jabber, giggle, and "play" with anything with which big sister is playing. Climbing the stairs is a relatively new interest, so my heart still lurches into my stomach when she decides to stand on a step midway up or down. She's so proud of her accomplishment, though. While the emptying out is a good developmental skill, I know, it is also maddening. People tell me I will miss finding stuff all over the house, but I'm just not quite convinced. Eating off the floor? Not possible for a child of mine. Alas, it is done on a daily basis. Dancing is another new talent, and it is the cutest bouncing, twisting, rocking you can imagine. Her jibber-jabber is so deliberate I feel as if she is trying to tell me something important. I can't wait until she says something besides hi. The giggling is so cute and so silly at the same time. We love it. And big sister NEVER complains when Kaia comes to "play" with her toys. Nor does she whine or cry or scream, "Mommy, help me!" at the top of her lungs.She loves crawling around with something in each of her hands, even though it makes her movement more difficult. A few days ago she latched on to these weird pink balls and wouldn't give them up for several hours. Even during meal times. Just look at her daring me to take them away.
Though not as frequently, she still wakes up during the night. I tried, really tried, to appreciate that alone time with her. At this point, though, I am so sleep-deprived I am over any alone time that involves anyone besides me, myself, and I. How's that for selfish?
My favorite recent memory with her was watching her learn how to clap. She focused so hard to put her two tiny hands together and it made me thankful for her mind that works.She loves people. She stares them down until they acknowledge her presence, and she especially loves her daddy, mommy, and sister. When seeing us for the first time in a day, it is as if she hasn't seen us in weeks. We love it.
I struggle with the heavy guilt of knowing that because of fatigue and depression I missed out on most of Kaia's first year. By missed out I mean it was very difficult to enjoy. Though there is really no way to make up for that, I am trying to be more positive, more grateful, more present.
To say I love this littlest lovie seems like an understatement, too.
